Cleave to your spouse...

This reading came at a perfect time. I feel as though I have been put on the back burner recently and it is not a good feeling. My husband recently accepted a job and Logan, Utah so he has been living there with his sister and her husband while I finish off the semester here in Rexburg. Living apart has been extremely hard. We see each other every weekend which is great, but it is still really challenging. While being in Logan, my husband has become extremely close with his sister. While I think this is great, I have often felt like he values the relationship he has with her more than the relationship he has with me.

I honestly felt like being apart put a huge strain on our marriage. We were arguing about stupid things and I was nervous to tell him the way I felt, because I didn’t want him to think I didn’t like his sister. One weekend when he came home, I sat him down and with tears in my eyes I expressed the way I felt. I wasn’t sure how he was going to take it, but with tears in his eyes he apologized sincerely. He was devastated that he put me in that situation and we promised that we would always put each other first.

“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” Genesis 2:24

I know the importance of cleaving unto your spouse. Sometimes it is really hard and I just want to call my parents, but I know that getting through hard times in a marriage simply strengthens the relationship you have with your spouse. 

Unity

I loved the reading for this week. My favorite article was “That we may be one” by Henry B. Eyring. He explains the importance of becoming one with your spouse. I never truly understood the importance of unity until I was married. I have seen and observed couples who aren’t unified and it is heartbreaking. I am grateful that my husband and I are on the same page about a lot things in our marriage. Another thing I have noticed in marriages is that men and women keep such a tight relationship with their parents, which is fine, but “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Gen. 2:24). I have seen this destroy many marriages. Some people just have a hard time letting go of their parents. I have a testimony of the power of unity. I know that if couples are unified, they will live a happy life. 

Fidelity in Marriage

This week’s lesson made my stomach turn. It is so sad and so scary that infidelity is becoming more and more common in marriages. My mind goes back to Goddard and the progression of unfaithfulness he shared. Where do we draw the line?

• ·         Behaviors that seem innocent
• ·         An affection grows that claims part of one’s heart
• ·         Extramarital flirting.  Justification-“no harm intended”
• ·         Relationship declared as “special”
• ·         Opportunities created to see “special friend”
• ·         Excuses made, lies told to hide time and resources spent on other person
• ·         Spouse is displaced. Emotional intimacy exchanged with “special friend”
• ·         Faultfinding with spouse
• ·         Fantasies about other person
• ·         Physical affection– a squeeze, a kiss, a hug
• ·         Sexual relations

I have observed this with close friends of mine and it is heartbreaking. I took a marriage prep class with my husband before we were married and my professor drilled this into our brains. He said that this can happen to anyone and that your spouse should NEVER have a “best friend” of the opposite sex. I have seen this destroy marriages and families. May we all be faithful members of this gospel as well as a faithful spouse.